I wish I could quit you..

I don't understand why my heart won't let go of him yet. It should be very apparent after the following instant message conversation that he wants me around as his "friend" because he wants to tell me things about HIM, and has little interest in ME. I don't see how I didn't notice how selfish he is for so long.

BrokeMyHeart says:
*mad waving*

Emily says:
Hi, calm down, what's up?

BMH says:
8 days left of work

Emily says:
awesome

BMH says:
wait... actually 7
2 more days this work week, then 5 next
I'm excited

Emily says:
I can tell

BMH says:
I talked to my 'rents yesterday, and they offered to come over and help me move at the end of next month

Emily says:
move to where?
closer to work?

BMH says:
not sure yet. I wanna get a roomie.

Emily says:
ah.

BMH says:
650 bucks a month is too much alone

Emily says:
oh yeah cause you said it was less money

BMH says:
even with what I'm making, it sucks
not to mention I'm a total slob when I live alone.
having a roomie makes me behave better

Emily says:
yeah well you can't have a roommate forever to make you clean, you'll have to get it together eventually

BMH says:
well hopefully eventually I'll settle down.
get a perma-roomie

Emily says:
you're gonna get a wife so you wont be slobbish
nice.

BMH says:
yup!
hey. I have issues. I can make them work for me
having people in my messy space makes me freak out.

Emily says:
perhaps you should work THROUGH the issues before you subject some poor woman to them

BMH says:
what? it's self-repairing.
I move in with a woman, I keep my space clean.
issue dissapears

Emily says:
ok. whatever
so you're just going to slob it up until you find some poor sucker that will move in with you?
maybe you should put an ad on craigslist
"needed, one woman to keep me clean"
that will work i'm sure

BMH says:
sheesh
no reason to get nasty
just because being in a situation changes my behavior doesn't put an imposition on the person.
that's a sentence fragment
or two
regardless
having some sort of social contact with a person other than virtual ones is good for me

Emily says:
well yeah it's good for everyone

BMH says:
living alone, I've found, is bad for me

Emily says:
well I guess the first step is identifying the problem

BMH says:
I just have a bad tendoncy towards hermitage

Emily says:
yeah amazingly that doesnt surprise me.

BMH says:
this is actually only the second time I've lived completely alone.

Emily says:
I'm getting to the point where I wish i lived alone
roommate had a sleepover at her cousin's last night and last night and this morning have been glorious

BMH says:
ahh...
I suppose both have their benefits

Emily says:
I really like alone time
like time where I'm completely alone in a house
not just like in my room

BMH says:
I like it too, but I can get that just by closing my door
at any rate, I need a cheaper place than this
I have like 8-900 bucks flying out the window every month
that's unnacceptable

(Sorry I know it was a long conversation)

I don't know if I'm misreading this or reading something into it, but there are maybe 3 sentences where I get to talk about me, and then he brings it right back around to him. I just think I'm finding out that us remaining friends is really only benefiting him and hurting me like mad. I really have to stop. The shit part about all of this is that figuring this out won't stop me from crying when The Clumsy Lovers come on the radio.