A Selfish Affair

I went on a date today. With myself.

And I'm planning on doing it again. GASP!

I realize there are possibly some of you out there (I got your comment PTG, I'm Sorry!) that are like "she's gone for MONTHS and now this bullshit?!". Here's the short explanation: Yes. This is it, I'm back I guess, or something. I appreciate all of your patience.

So I went on a date of sorts with myself today. I really needed it. It feels like it's been a lifetime since I've been on a proper date. The kind where you go to a scheduled activity but then find time before and after to just wander around and learn about each other. I went to the Monterey Bay Aquarium today. It was really incredible! I encourage anyone that lives in that area, or visits often or is looking for a vacation to GO! The water is gorgeous, there are tons of little shops and restaurants and all kinds of fun stuff around and great people watching!

I think there is great truth in the idea of loving yourself before you can or should love someone else. I also think it's easier to accept love from a person when you love you and they love them. I realize that's a heavy thought right now, but just let it sink in over time. I decided it was full well time I fell in love with myself. I'm not sure that I ever have and If I did, I kind of lost it. So I went on a date today. And it was LOVELY.

The Aquarium is beautiful and fascinating and basically just stunning all around. I will be very honest with you and say that I only went at the urging of a friend (Thank you Einstein) and my uncle. I thought to myself "what else do I have to lose? I'm down here over the weekend, not going anywhere" so I went. I learned something new about myself (such a great thing on a date). I am fascinated by undersea wildlife! Being so close to those creatures felt really humbling. All of that is going on BELOW the surface, amazing!

I then took myself to dinner and ate over the ocean. That's right, at a restaurant that hangs out OVER the pacific. GORGEOUS. I'm not sure what my life has in store for me next, or what path I'll choose but I do know this. I feel extremely hopeful about my future.

I took a leisurely walk back to my car and on the way bought myself some yummy Ghirardelli chocolates and some little gifts for the roommate and the dog:)

On my way back to my hotel (about an hour) I blasted the Broadway show tune channel on satellite radio (yes I'm a huge geek) and just thought about the day I'd had. I wasn't focused on "boy wouldn't this be so much better if a significant other (or insert name here) was here with me? No. I was excited about discovering that I am fascinated by the ocean. That I can entertain myself. That I have so many layers and they are all amazing, and also that I can do anything I want and I will be OK.

In closing, thanks for sticking with me folks, I feel happy that you somehow knew I'd be back some day. Here are some pictures from my little trip. Go on a date with yourself!

Huge FISH!

Who knew the beach made me so happy?

JELLIES!

OMFG! CUTE ASS PENGUINS

Carmel By the Sea: probably paradise for sure.